Thursday, July 21, 2005

You Can Sleep While I Drive

So I'm notorious for overprocessing and worrying over the stupidest littlest thing...I'm driving home tonight on a gorgeous sunny afternoon through the foothills of Menlo Park and my mind is off on its own compiling a list of things that scare me the most (don't ask why I do these things). I'm going through traffic at a moderate pace, when I do my usual onramp vehicle check via the rear-view mirror and Ford Crown Vic with white roof, entering the freeway, sneaking behind some traffic. I back off the throttle to a modest 65 and tuck in front of some Camry in the #4 lane, waiting for California's Finest to move on. I really hate speed limits. Don't get me wrong, I am happy for the service that our state's Highway Patrolmen provide. But I just hate limits. Its just a constant reminder saying "you don't know how to drive safe", that there are stupid people out there on the road who will ruin it for all of us driving way faster than conditions. But on a beautiful sunny afternoon like this? On one of the nation's most well designed freeway? Stop keeping me from doing what I enjoy doing, at the pace that I feel comfortable. But I guess I can see why it'll never happen, it's just too much of an attitude change, with a horribly broken driver education system, and the need to raise money through easily executed traffic violations -- everyone and their grandma speeds.

Anyways. Something that I have yet to understand... 34 years and I still don't get why I'm a terrible planner, fly-by-the-seat-of-the-pants, put my faith into fate kind of guy and yet, I still find myself constantly overprocessing and worrying about stupid crap. Maybe I have a slight case of ADD and my mind is repeatedly searching for things to focus on? I remember how wonderful it was when I was working on code...there was something so very calming about tracking a hundred different function calls, input output parameters, static variables, class definitions...It just felt so easy to just block out the rest of the world and find that I've spent 14 hours perfecting the implementation of some socket service.

Whatever. Enough of this...Time to grab myself a bowl of Blueberry Morning cereal. Or maybe a turkey sammich. With alfalfa sprouts. And swiss cheese. On sourdough bread. Aw crap, I don't have mayo. Damnit.

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