Wednesday, January 17, 2007

The Power Of White Sauce

I've always been a sucker for fat. Packaged in little rectangular boxes of yellow sweetness that melts into a hot pan for shrimp scampi, or sitting in between the crunchy skin and dry meat of lechon kawali, the stuff just makes me go crazy. So standing in line at the cafeteria for my boringly usual routine of a Chicken Caesar salad (with extra anchovies, please) my attention was diverted by that fantastic sound of fat sizzling on hot pans over open flames. Or maybe it was those 3 young attractive women standing in front of the food stand? Whatever the case, I couldn't help but investigate the commotion...two chefs banging steel pans against the heavy wrought iron stove top grates, yellow flames erupting 2 feet into the air as the grease spilled onto the stove. "Pasta Bar," the sign read. "Choose your pasta, protein, and sauce". Hmmmmm... I better get in on the action before it got too popular. Penne or bowtie pasta? Bowtie, definitely. Chicken, sausage or veggies? Chicken. No, wait...sausage sounds SOOOOOO good. Sausage it is. Sauce: white or red? That white sauce must have cream. And you KNOW where you'll end up, you dumbass lactose intolerant asian. Stop fooling yourself that you can eat more dairy, I don't care if you could eat little scoops of ice cream without the magic pill, your late thirties tummy won't be able to handle a full on dish of cream sauce. And aren't you supposed to be on a diet? "White sauce, please"

Cafeteria - Lunch

The worst part is that I told myself long ago to not waste my calorie allowance on mediocre meals and bland food. Oh, temptation...when will I ever learn?

And so not more than two hours later did my body pay the price.
What blows me away was the dude in the stall next to me was talking on the phone!!! Naaaasty!

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At 1/18/2007 10:28 AM, Blogger DJ John said...

Why do people think its cool to talk on a cellphone in the toilet!!!

At 1/18/2007 10:50 AM, Blogger VirtualErn said...

And I was trying really hard to make all the noise that I could possibly make (including several courtesy flushes). Weirdos...I woulda hung up on his ass.

At 1/20/2007 12:11 AM, Anonymous tin said...

in japan they have a courtesy flush sound button to disguise farts,grunts,throw up, poo blasts and blow out affairs. one more reason its the coolest place on earth.


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