donger need food.

The Land Of The Automobile

Los Angeles: picture millions of tiny little rodents scurrying around hundreds of miles of concrete paths in the middle of a parched palm-tree-lined desert.

I guess you could say I've had a love-hate relationship with the city. Growing up in her small-town neighbor to the south, I always looked to L.A. as this immensely huge uncharted land of opportunity. She beckoned with temptations of vast single screen movie theaters with unbelievably good sound systems (not just loud, but high fidelity!), the original Cheesecake Factory, Sunset Blvd, Santa Monica Pier, and absolutely geeky things like the Nakatomi Plaza & Bradbury Building... It was little anyone can do to contain my frustration stuck in the confines of middle-class suburban life south of The 8.

The fascination started way back in high school. Senior ditch day had me hopping in the big brown pimpmobile for a two hour trek to see what that whole town is all about. It continued on, with more-often-than-not-day-trips for a slice of cheesecake, watching a big movie, Tommyburgers... But sometime late in college it eventually wore off. I think I could pinpoint it to a single event: a Cisco training trip I took back in 1997, which had me staying downtown near Union Square. I absolutely fell in love with San Francisco.

Eventually the novelty of L.A. wore off...all I see now is a barren wasteland infested by hundreds of billions of cars. It's unbelievable how bad it's gotten. Over the course of 10 years, the city has managed to choke its infrastructure with the automobile. Pick a day. Any day. Any time. There's traffic everywhere. And the cars aren't just on the freeways, they're even on the tiny side streets. Everywhere you look, there's *somebody* driving a car. It really is quite a weird feeling. And the pollution collects in one place: Riverside. I remember one business trip had me out in Loma Linda...I looked up and all I saw was this putrid black smoke in the air all around me. It was depressing.

And it's so freakin hot. The ozone depleted atmosphere conspire with millions of tons of concrete & asphalt to form a ground-level oven that melts the shoes beneath my feet and cause beads of sweat to pour from my face. And where are the trees? Those 50 foot palm trees sprinkled throughout the city are at best a humurous attempt at vegetation.

But then there are the hot dogs.


And those incredibly hot, gorgeous, and oh-so-fit pretty people. They're everywhere!. Materialistic, shallow and mean as they may be -- who cares, as long as they look good!! (Sorry, no pictures...but trust me, they ARE everywhere)

And then there's the absolute best Korean BBQ I have ever had.


And then you find yourself with the windows down, driving down a street for what seems like an hour now and not hitting a traffic light. That's right...if you time it right, you can hit every single green on a 7-mile stretch of road. After the sun sets, the city comes alive and the heat no longer rains down UV terror. With the windows down (or if you're really lucky, the top down), you can cruise for hours listening to music, watching people, chit-chatting with your car mates, letting the wind going through your hair, wearing shorts & a T-shirt, and never have to turn on the heater.

Maybe Los Angeles isn't so bad after all.

posted by VirtualErn @ 11:53 AM

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